Shannon’s Perspective:
“If ever there was someone to keep me at home it would be you.”
Larry’s write up covers most of what I would have written as well, with the exception of my feelings the first time he gave me this song.
I have always known that Larry has what my grandma called “itchy feet”, her version of wanderlust, and there has always been a small voice in my head that said if you wake up and he’s gone don’t be surprised. Although a very strong case could be made that it was my level of crazy and not his “itchy feet” that would make him leave but that’s a debate for another time. When he gave me this song, I knew that I would never have to worry about his itchy feet again.
This song comes from the Into The Wild movie soundtrack. The movie is based on the true story of a fella by the name of Christopher McCandless AKA Alexander Supertramp. If I had not met Shannon or even married, I would want either A) To be abducted, or B) To live a life like Christopher McCandless as the movie portrays.
No-one on this planet knows me better than Shannon, and she will vouch that I would be absolutely fine living life alone - and that being a nomadic wanderer seeing all there is to see is exactly who I would want to be.
So on a deeper level this song for me is a Catch-22, starting with the first line:
"On bended knee is no way to be free"
I bent the knee. Yes to marriage, but I interpret this more with the corporate life I led for 29 years. Sure there were good years and I did get to travel the U.S. and internationally, but overall that was no way to be free.
"Circles they grow and they swallow people whole - Half their lives they say goodnight to wives they'll never know"
I've thought about this line a lot over the years. I've been fortunate enough to have a relationship where those words have never been uttered. I can honestly say that as much as we have the capacity to remember, we have shared everything. I've literally and figuratively probably forgotten more that we've actually shared than not. So I know Shannon. And she knows me. And all I can hope is that my sons are as lucky as we are.
"If ever there was someone to keep me at home - It would be you"
I'm now going to plagiarize myself - because I put this song on a "mix-tape" I gave Shannon years ago:
"Listen to this song as if you were in my or Gabriel's mind. Although you may think we live lonely lives, we don't see it that way most of the time. Please know that although my "inner self" craves everything this movie represents, I do not regret for one second what I have experienced with you. I do not feel "tied down" and am grateful for what I have learned about myself and how I have grown on this journey. I feel sadness for the fact that Christopher McCandless never got to experience the types of joys and sorrows that I have. Of all the songs in this collection that I could "give" to you, this one probably means the most. "If ever there was someone to keep me at home - It would be you..."
Guaranteed
On bended knee is no way to be free
Lifting up an empty cup, I ask silently
All my destinations will accept the one that's me
So I can breathe
Circles they grow and they swallow people whole
Half their lives they say goodnight to wives they'll never know
Got a mind full of questions and a teacher in my soul
And so it goes
Don't come closer or I'll have to go
Owning me like gravity are places that pull
If ever there was someone to keep me at home
It would be you
Everyone I come across in cages they bought
They think of me and my wandering but I'm never what they thought
Got my indignation but I'm pure in all my thoughts
I'm alive
Wind in my hair I feel part of everywhere
Underneath my being is a road that disappeared
Late at night I hear the trees they're singing with the dead
Overhead
Leave it to me as I find a way to be
Consider me a satellite forever orbiting
I know all the rules but the rules did not know me
Guaranteed
Ghost of a Chance 