Shannon’s Pick: Unwell

“All day starin' at the ceilin' makin'
Friends with shadows on my wall
All night hearing voices tellin' me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for somethin'
Hold on, feelin' like I'm headed for a breakdown
And I don't know why

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay a while and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me”

Way back in 2002 when this album was released, I was immediately drawn to this song in particular.  Why?  Well, because I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell. I am also amused by the fact that the Merriam- Webster dictionary defines unwell as being in poor health or undergoing menstruation.  But on a more serious note, when I first shared this song with Larry his reaction was not exactly what I was expecting.  I asked him to listen to it and to give me his thoughts.  I didn’t go much into my own thoughts other than I thought this song could really give him insight into my um “unwellness”.  It did not go as I had hoped, my hope was that it would bring him some relief that I have always been this way.  Instead, he was hurt and upset that I still felt that way, even after marriage and kids. 

At the time the conflict it brought up was not what I was looking for, but it might have been what I needed.  My brother Shane had been gone for 5 years at this point and I was still very much struggling with that loss even though I was telling everyone I was ok, so I think this song may have been a cry for help.  In the end I think the conversations it forced us to have only brought us closer and made us stronger.

Now when I hear this song I still think back to that time but I also think about my current situation with my health and realize how literally the lyrics apply to my life.

P.S. The album More Than You Think You Are (which included this song) was released on November 19, 2002, exactly one decade after Larry and I started dating.

Larry’s Perspective:

So Matchbox Twenty has been in Shannon's rotation basically forever. So as an innocent bystander, they've been in my rotation as well.

While I don't think her "obsession" is on the same level as Prince, it has to be pretty close - both them and Rob Thomas solo.

I'm really curious to hear Shannon's thoughts on this song, because it's become a song that I would put on a playlist I've recently started and discussed with Shannon called "Second Time Around".

These are songs that meant a lot previously, but they've taken on a whole new meaning to one or both of us as life progresses. Which makes them great songs.

I'm sure Shannon has literally shared with me in the past what the "first time around" meant, but again, I really do have a poor memory. I hope she isn't upset with me... 

P.S. Now that Shannon has shared her thoughts, the irony is not lost on me that I was upset with her the first time around.